Gary Vee and Me Agree Self-Accountability = Happiness

Accountability Personal leadership

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Story: Is self-accountability fundamental to happiness? My experience is that many people think they’re self-accountable, yet fail to realize they often behave in ways that are opposite. One way or another, they explain away their unhappy circumstances as somebody else’s fault. I’ve been in so many executive meetings where it became an art form to blame others or hide the lack of responsibility in amorphous terms like the evil “silo.” In fact, silos have been known to be the cause of most organization ills. What malarkey, and a testimony to how insidious unaccountability is. So my direct answer is a resounding, “yes!” Being fiercely and personally accountable is a key ingredient for one’s (and organizations’) happiness.

Gary Vaynerchuk, the widely followed blogger, podcaster, venture capitalist and all around raconteur, recently published a popular blog that connected self-accountability and happiness. He talks about five reminders why he thinks accountability leads to happiness. The headlines are:

  1. “COMPLAINING GIVES AWAY LEVERAGE.
  2. BLAMING YOURSELF ISN’T THE SAME AS JUDGING YOURSELF.
  3. COMPLAINING ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE MAKES YOU FEEL HELPLESS.
  4. OWNING YOUR WEAKNESSES TAKES AWAY THEIR LEVERAGE.
  5. BLAMING YOURSELF LEADS TO THE OUTCOME YOU WERE LOOKING FOR BY BLAMING OTHERS.”

Key Point: I agree with Gary Vee about the freedom and sense of autonomy that comes from taking full ownership for one’s situation. Regardless of what happens, and any misfortune, a true self-accountable person asks one question first: “What can I do about it?” There is little or no time invested in complaining or feeling victimized, as seductive as a little whining may be. This does not mean ignoring feelings of hurt, regret, guilt or whatever. Awareness about how one feels and self-compassion is vital for personal growth. However, self-accountable people focus their exclusive attention on changing matters they are not satisfied with. They avoid getting stuck in a rut that they find unacceptable. Self-accountable people are also confident enough to seek help when necessary, without giving away personal autonomy. They are respectful of the viewpoints of others, and still avoid being paralyzed by the harshness of judgement.

Where I disagree with Gary Vee, is in his use of the word “blame.” I think all blame is waste and mostly about shame. Self-accountable people that are evolving in the right direction do not invest in blaming themselves any more than they do others. They compassionately accept, learn or unlearn, and then take full responsibility to move forward. I also encourage people to spend less time concerning themselves with leverage over others than embracing the full joy of being autonomous and perusing mastery.

Lead Yourself Moves:

  1. Recognize that when you take ownership, you are adding to your happiness quotient.
  2. Always lead with the question, “what can I do about it?” Then ACT!
  3. Fight against blaming anyone or anything. It is wasteful.

Lead Others Moves:

  1. When you find people reporting to you blaming someone or something else, constructively confront them. 
  2. Set the example. By confidently and humbly being self-accountable, leaders set the stage for controlling one’s destiny and teaching others to do the same.
  3. Self-accountability also means being clear about expectations from others. Do not expect them to read your mind so you fall in the trap of blaming them for a disconnect.

Happy self-accountability in Personal Leadership,

Lorne

One Millennial View: I don’t mind admitting that Millennials might be stereotyped as the most “it wasn’t me” generation, able to professionally throw blame around like Tom Brady slings a football. And unfortunately, we’ve often seen this mindset be profitable, encouraged and applauded. We’ve witnessed shame work as insurance for our own safety, protecting our jobs, relationships and more. So, what can we do about it? Well, thanks to well-informed, logically based messages from blogs like this one, we can put effort into finding and spreading the happiness of self-accountability, especially in spaces where blame seems to recycle through the atmosphere like air conditioning on a plane.

– Garrett

Blog 955

Edited and published by Garrett Rubis

 

New Peer to Peer Power

Abundance Accountability Personal leadership Respect

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Story: Some people who worked with me implementing the Google G Suite platform at my previous company still think it was primarily a technology initiative. However my team’s intent was to create a work renaissance and revolution. My belief is the old power controlling resources, innovation and decision making is dissolving rapidly. New power values are about collaboration, adaption, crowd wisdom, self-organization, radical democracy and transparency, impact assignments, tours of duty, a “find it, learn it, do it” mindset, and more. This workplace transformation is still not obvious to many, and when standing in the middle of a change from well-understood norms to new power forms; it can be disorienting and even frightening.

Key Point: Today, as powerfully explained in their exceptional book entitled New Power by Jeremy Heimans and Henry Timms, our lab is the world. Digging into that way of thinking can be a super mind bender. One has to embrace learning and unlearning by being a technologist, futurist, transformer and hopefully humanist. The workplace, regardless of industry, is going to feel like it’s in a 8.0 earthquake and no one is immune. As Heimans and Timms state: “Too often, this tension gets lampooned as Old Codger versus Young Turk. AARP versus ADD. But there is a deeper cultural shift playing out as old and new power values do battle at work.” This blog is just an appetizer. I hope to inspire you to learn and unlearn much more about new power.

Lead Yourself Moves:

  1. Learn what it means to think and act more as a Founder: Create things, feel ownership, live with transparency, learn to navigate being all in/always on, and to drive constructive movement.
  2. Think of yourself on “tours of duty” versus a career or job.

Lead Others Moves:

  1. Embrace the concept that leaders are designers.
  2. Take the New Power quiz to see where you are on the New Power/Old Power spectrum.

New Power in Personal Leadership,

Lorne

One Millennial View: I’m very curious to learn more about this, and do harbor an appreciation for some “old power” values. For example, I believe in the credibility of a boss with experience, I think competition among co-workers is healthy and motivating, and while transparency can be awesome, forcing everyone to reveal how much they earn teeters on the line of “that’s nobody’s business but my own (my boss and HR’s), and impolite for anyone to ask.” Some other new power values are great, and I look forward to learning/unlearning more.

– Garrett

Blog 954

Edited and published by Garrett Rubis

 

Lead In With Lorne Podcast: Autumn is a Metaphor For Career Change

Abundance Accountability Personal leadership Podcast Respect

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Hi readers and listeners,  

We invite you to take a couple minutes to watch/listen to our new podcast, Lead In with Lorne Rubis: A Leadership Story to Start Off Your Week.

This week’s podcast discusses how Autumn is a metaphor for change/reinvention, with a personal story attached. Enjoy it on the YouTube video embedded below, and stay tuned for it to be available to access/subscribe to on iTunes and other audio options soon. We hope it enriches your Monday morning. 

– Lorne and Garrett Rubis 

Living the Best of No. 41

Personal leadership Respect

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Story: I wore No. 41 playing football in both high school and college. When I pulled the jersey over my shoulder pads, a sense of fierce obligation to my teammates and commitment to victory soaked into my whole being. It became my lucky number. So this blog is dedicated to the No. 41, and of course this past week, that number served to accompany a worldwide tribute to the passing of the 41st President of the United States, George Herbert Walker Bush. This commentary is a NOT intended to be a maudlin, over-bloated, blind statement of praise toward GHW. He has plenty of imperfections, both political and personal (beyond broccoli and his short golf game) for historians and pundits to feast on. However, as an observer of LEADERSHIP,  there is much to appreciate in No. 41 throughout his entire human journey.

In his inaugural address on Jan. 20, 1989, President H.W. Bush had turned to the leaders of Congress and declared, I take as my guide the hope of a saint: In crucial things, unity; in important things, diversity; in all things, generosity.”

Key Point: The best of leadership values survive the vagaries of current trends and circumstance. Compassion, Courage, Commitment accompanied by Kindness, Humility, Generosity, Forgiveness, Care, Service, Humor and more were the values that permeated most days throughout Bush’s well documented life. He imperfectly lived them daily, and with integrity did more than simply announce them. I believe in 2018 we need to pause and honor this way of leading and living. We need to celebrate where and when these values win the day for the advancement of humankind. Perhaps President George H.W. Bush said it best at his inaugural address (as noted below). I think our reflection on this statement and George H.W.’s better self, even if it’s a brief moment, makes No. 41 a lucky number.

“We are not the sum of our possessions. They are not the measure of our lives. In our hearts we know what matters. We cannot hope only to leave our children a bigger car, a bigger bank account. We must hope to give them a sense of what it means to be a loyal friend; a loving parent; a citizen who leaves his home, his neighborhood, and town better than he found it.”

– George H.W. Bush

Lead Yourself Moves:

  1. In your heart, you know what matters. Do that!
  2. Live the imperfect best of No. 41.

Lead Others Moves:

  1. Same as above. 

Living Lucky No. 41 in Personal Leadership,

Lorne

One Millennial View: Funny enough, according to Affinity Numerology (whatever that may be), the No. 41 “tends to express an innate sense of personal freedom with building a secure foundation for the future.” When analyzing the values believed and practiced by George H.W. Bush, after a lifetime of service for freedom, at the very least that’s an interesting coincidence. And perhaps numbers really can be as lucky as we think.

– Garrett

Blog 953

Edited and published by Garrett Rubis

 

Rethinking Gifts at Work This Holiday

Abundance Personal leadership

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Story: The following note (I’ve removed information that might disclose the person’s identity) was unexpected, and came from someone I’ve not connected with very much over the last couple of years. It made me a little choked up.

“I wanted to reconnect to say what an absolute privilege it was to be a part of your team. I joined… and was bug-eyed in awe over your vision for [the company]. How did I get so lucky to work at such a place? In my early days we were having a big meeting/discussion about trust, and I questioned why — in that case — we would put new people through a 6-month probation period. You promptly nixed probation, period. Your vision for [the company], your ability to share that vision through story-telling, and most impressively your rallying of the team towards that vision has been something truly remarkable to be a part of. The legacy that you have left behind are precious gifts. Lastly, throughout everything, you were always 100% genuine you. From your smile & laughs, to your dance moves, to your time for a quick hello… Your presence emanated throughout… And paved a foundation that I feel very fortunate to still be… I’m a better team member because of you, a better contributor to [the company] and a better person. I look forward to continuing to hear your words of wisdom, and hope that our paths may cross again.”

The best gifts I’ve received from people at work have been in the form of a lasting memory. People who have taken some time to write a precious note like the one above is an example. In a few cases (like the painting I received from a team of colleagues), something material will also be treasured. The same can be said for a few awards that recognize legacy contribution. I can still remember receiving a prestigious Chairman’s award with two other colleagues for something called the “Cottage Strategy.” The work led by this group of people transformed a Fortune 50 company’s approach to the market. The walk up to the stage to share in the award is forever embossed in my mind. Yet, the gifts that have actually changed my life the most are the ones like the excerpt above, where someone has personally told me that I’ve made a difference to them.

Key Point: I think that a Starbucks card or bottle of wine are nice holiday season gifts, I really do. And I’ve been grateful when I’ve received or given them. Still, the gifts that keep on giving as the cliche goes, are those that cost nothing but your thoughtful time, and are truly priceless to the receiver. So who at work (besides your boss) might you give a big bright present made up of your most sincere gift of appreciation? What thoughtfully crafted words will you use to tell someone how much they’ve made a difference in your life? That gift will be opened many times.

Lead Yourself Moves:

  1. How about if you take a quiet moment during a very busy holiday season to tell someone, in detail, how they’ve positively had an impact on you? It could be digital or actually a handwritten card. It will go into that person’s “big head file,” and on the day they really need it, it’s there to reopen. No returns or gift receipts required.

Lead Others Moves:

  1. Take a moment to tell every direct report how you SEE them, and how much they matter to you and/or the organization’s or group’s purpose.

Lasting Gifts in Personal Leadership,

Lorne

One Millennial View: There’s a reason secret Santa gifts are often gags, they aren’t expected to mean much or last very long. While the fish shaped neck tie or dollar store trinket is always fun, a meaningful note probably won’t wind up in the trash before New Years.

– Garrett

Blog 952 edited and published by Garrett Rubis