Fight or Flight or Might at Work?

Conflict is a normal part of work. How did you and I handle it this week?

Ok, you came to work every day in this new year with a smile and growth mind set. You’ve been reading my blogs and you are committed to living the Character Triangle.  Then it happened. It set you and me off. What was it and what did we do about it?

The very first thing to remember is that every thing is a process. Most times conflict at work happens because of a process break down. Rarely do people do things intentionally to screw us over. (If that is their intention, they usually need counseling.)  So the first thing to do is to observe and describe the process that failed, and outline the consequences of the failure.   If we can unemotionally and objectively do that we can usually have a constructive dialogue with those that are part of the process. We learn to attack the process and not each other. We learn to have what I describe in earlier blogs as being capable of having a crucial conversation.

So what did we do this week, when IT happened? Did we document the process problem? Did we positively engage our team members in addressing the situation? Or did we get mad and stew? Complain to others who have no influence? Whine to our boss? Avoided it all together?

  • Action: Let’s chose to act as leaders and use conflict as an opportunity for process improvement and personal growth. Let’s minimize the amount of time we avoid or allow conflict to boil. Let’s learn from the conflict that happened this week and apply lessons through the rest of the year.  So conflict can lead to constructive might rather than the shortcomings of flight or fight.

 

Might in the Triangle,

Lorne

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