Character Move:

1. Give your own Daruma a black eye.
2. Then give it a second black eye.
3. Always connect the painting of the second eye with celebration and gratitude.

Gratitude in the Triangle,

Lorne

My website host has been rock solid for all the time my website has been up (since April 2010). My team did extensive planning to make sure we had a smooth book launch. Yesterday after my blog was posted, and after I sent an extensive email announcement that my book was available for purchase, it came to my attention that my site was down! (Since 7:00 am PDT no less.) The hosting company, which has been very reliable to date, had network issues and a number of other back-up challenges. I wish I could tell you it was because my book went viral and overloaded the servers, but I don’t think that was the root cause. Ha-ha.

Anyway, by 3:00 pm PDT yesterday, the site was up and running again but I know a lot of customers were bounced… …darn. I apologize if that happened to you. It is so enticing to want to blame someone and feel victimized, etc. But instead, if I take a deep breath, I realize this gives me an opportunity to contact you again about the book, and practice the principles I write about. Now I don’t say in the book that it is always easy or even enjoyable to live in the Triangle. If I want to live the principles, it doesn’t mean just doing so when all is groovy.

Also, based on the feedback we’ve received you can now click on the image of my book and go directly to the order page. But, if you are NOT on my site and reading this as a subscription e-mail, please go http://www.lornerubis.com to order the book.

Character Move:

1. Enjoy the irony and breath deeply.
2. View challenges as poignant opportunity to practice the CT principles.
3. Find the underlying benefit when %^$# happens, and leverage if possible.

Re-launching in the Triangle,

Lorne

To order my book, please click on the “book” tab (above; on the navigation bar at the top of my home page). You can buy the book in any format AND receive a 25% discount by applying the following friends and family discount code - “LRCT”. Please feel free to share this code with anyone who you think might enjoy the book.

What I most care about is that readers apply concepts taken from the book, and as a result improve the well being of themselves and others. I know practicing the Character Triangle as a system WILL build character, have an impact, and inspire others. And that defines success in a very personal and unique way.

Character Move:

1. Buy and read the Character Triangle.
2. Practice the principles daily.
3. Share it with people you care about.

Thank you for celebrating with me. Reading and making the book come alive completes the book. THANK YOU!

Celebrating in the Triangle,

Lorne

STP in the Triangle,

Lorne

My wife and I saw 50/50 in the theater. The story revolves around a young man with spinal cancer and a glimpse into his search for healing and survival. At home we ended up watching Sister’s Keeper, different but with the same theme. But, just in the nick of time a loved one gave me an antidote I’d like to share with you – a nine minute video celebrating life.

Louie Schwartzberg is an award-winning cinematographer, director, and producer whose notable career spans more than three decades. As a visual artist, Louie has created some of the most iconic and memorable film moments of our time. For TED Talks, Schwartzberg presents a video of gratitude and uses the fresh eyes of a child and senior to help us stop and take notice.

Character Move: I challenge you to take nine minutes, stop yourself from what you’re doing now, to soak in the following video. Louis helps us pause to inhale that which is present. And this very moment is all we really know for sure that we have. One moment our mortality will be standing right beside us. Hopefully your investment in the nine minutes will be an insight into how to make the distance longer and richer.

Having Gratitude for life in the Triangle,

Lorne

Marcel Proust, French Philosopher

IBM annually surveys about 1500 CEOs and asks them to identify the most critical issues facing their businesses. The most recent survey highlighted two issues: 1) managing complexity, and 2) developing creativity. They also emphasize that the need for innovation from individuals and groups as perhaps the most elusive trait, obviously necessary to address the complexity challenge. This data has personal implications for you and me. As the world changes faster and faster around us, if we are not constantly reinventing ourselves, we will likely be replaced by someone who brings more value and/or a better approach. How do we constantly reinvent ourselves? What can we learn from people who study and apply innovation as a core business?

IDEO is a highly reputable firm located in Palo Alto, California. They are hired by tier one firms to bring creative solutions to solve big time problems and/or create new market opportunities. They have worked on literally thousands of projects usually concluding with outstanding outcomes for their clients. In studying what the most important ingredients for driving creativity and innovation, they highlight two very important elements underneath their success: 1) Become an anthropologist, and 2) think verbs not nouns. If you want to dig deeper to understand the analysis behind this, read books written by Tom Kelley.

By becoming an anthropologist IDEO challenges us to do the opposite of Déjà Vu (i.e. “we’ve been there before”) and to apply vuja de – to see where we are with fresh eyes. Thinking in verbs rather than nouns, IDEO emphasizes that we tend to focus on providing an experience. And it’s an experience that generates and creates feeling and emotion; something others can find value in.

Character Move:

1. Vuja de yourself and your situation. Look at yourself and your environment with fresh eyes. What do you see that you might have overlooked or discounted? Remember that the root of respect, one of the core values of the Character Triangle is “to look again.” Know yourself more and you will continue to reinvent yourself. See yourself with fresh eyes!
2. Ask yourself how people want to describe the experience of interacting with you. Think of yourself as a set of verbs NOT nouns. Who really cares, after we present our label or title, what you and I are (nouns)? But, we know people really care about how we make them feel!

Let’s reinvent and create every day. The world around us is changing daily but that just provides us a glorious incentive to sharpen our anthropological skills and evolve….clearly a verb!

Vuja de in the Triangle,

Lorne

Doris died in her 100th year, in March 2010, but not before running for the U.S. Senate in New Hampshire at age 94 (34% of the votes as a last minute entry) and having a significant impact on federal legislation aimed at curbing the impact of lobbyists on elected federal representatives. At the age of 89, she decided to walk from Los Angeles to Washington, D.C. to raise awareness on her belief for the need for comprehensive federal campaign funding reform.  She started her walk with no support team, little fanfare, and only her social security.  But her passion, conviction, intelligence, and charm caught the attention of journalists, thousands of everyday folks and eventually all of Congress. Granny D, the nickname bestowed upon her, became an expert at keeping the focus on her cause. Bronchitis, emphysema, and arthritis plagued her journey, not to mention the other aches and pains one would expect on a 3,200-mile hike. Averaging 10 miles per day, she battled the challenging terrain and all vagaries of weather, including a twister in Texas that almost carried her right off the road.

Ironically, she worked in a New Hampshire shoe factory for 20 years, Granny D wore out four pairs of sneakers as a tribute to her tenacity in getting to the finish line. She even cross country skied part of the way when a snow storm threatened to delay her getting to Capital Hill. Ms. Haddock was widely acclaimed as having influence on the passage of the bipartisan 2002 McCain/Feingold Act aimed at addressing the very issue of her valiant trek. Even when the Supreme Court struck down sections of the bill just before her death, Doris was upbeat in her belief that the cause would be taken up again; even more effectively the next time around. But the neatest thing about her was that she was just a citizen… not super human, just an old woman who could be excused for taking the couch rather than the open road!

This blog is not about the complexities and merits of campaign funding. Other pundits are much more capable at facilitating that debate. This is about self accountably and abundance, and Doris would say it is about respect for the constitution. Doris underscored that it is never too late to take that first step. Before you know it 3000 miles are behind you, and in Doris’ words, you will have “raised a little hell.”

Character Move:

1. Do it now. Take the first step, and then take one step at a time.
2. You have enough to start. You have what you need. You lack nothing but the mindset and conviction.
3. Just enjoy the journey and what you will learn about yourself and others along the way!

In honor of her tireless dedication and self accountability Granny D is the newest member in my Character Hall of Fame.

It’s never too late (to raise a little hell) in the Triangle,

Lorne

I know that I’ve been extremely fortunate to have been married for 40 years to a partner whom I can openly discuss anything. Her insight and feedback has been instrumental to my leadership and decision making. As a voracious reader, most of my important ideas have been uniquely built on the many thoughts of others, genuinely soaking into my own belief and habit system.

Former Yale professor William Deresiewicz, who was the source of my recent Jane Austen blog, pointed me to a lecture on leadership he gave to West Point Cadets in 2009. That speech had a huge impact, including a note of recognition from General David Petraeus. I strongly urge you to read it. Deresiewicz’s lecture essentially reinforced concentrated solitude and personal intimacy as crucial ingredients to drive authentic and powerful leadership. His premise is that we have too many “sheep leaders”, people exceptionally smart but short on having the ability to authentically think through complex issues while developing creative solutions.

Character Move:

1. Make it an integral part of your personal development system to invest in solitude and concentration (without distraction of outside influences). Make it a point to increase self awareness by having crucial conversations with YOURSELF. This will support an evolution of an authentic self and personal leadership framework. Thinking for yourself means finding your real self.
2. Recognize that having an intimate mate or mates, to engage in meaningful conversations that can help you develop and test your guideposts, is a vital part of one’s life. We need real friends not just Facebook friends. One of the best ways, as Deseriewicz points out, of talking to yourself is talking to an intimate other, someone with whom you can unfold your soul.

Creating Intimate Solitude in the Triangle,

Lorne

The answers to these two questions will impact how they think about you and me and how they behave towards us. Professor Susan Fiske of Princeton University has shown that all social judgments can be boiled down to these two dimensions (Fiske et al., 2007):

1. How warm is this person? The idea of warmth includes things like trustworthiness, friendliness, helpfulness, sociability and so on. Initial warmth judgments are made within a few seconds of meeting you.

2. How competent is this person? Competency judgments take longer to form and include things like intelligence, creativity, perceived ability, and so on.

Susan Fiske’s research has looked at different cultures, times and types of social judgments, and these two concepts come up repeatedly. The primacy of warmth and competence seems to involve reactions to  the questions of friend versus foe, and a person’s capacity for helping or hurting us.

Character Move: Consciously accept that we judge and are being judged very quickly and very early during new interactions.  Being Respectful, one of the tenants of the Character Triangle (CT), will promote friendliness and warmth (being a friend and not a foe). Self-accountability, the second tenant, drives competence (I own my own behavior and contribution).  And third, Abundance adds to the trust (expanding the “pie” and not fight over who gets the biggest piece).

Practice the Character Triangle and you will position yourself for a strong first impression. Watch the behavior of others relative to the CT and you can effectively and quickly determine whether to “pull” or “push.” In this case “taking cover” means proactively designing first impressions… the cover of your “book.”

Taking “(book) cover” in the Triangle,

Lorne